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Archive for June, 2007

Excellent Analysis of Sopranos Finale

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 30th, 2007

Bob Harris: television writer, radio personality, and political pundit writes the very best analysis I’ve read about the Sopranos series finale.

He opines that not only did Tony Soprano die, he practically received a funeral. It’s a long read so here are some highlights that I’m overtly stealing:

So, starting with the two most blatant clues and working outward until we stumble into what may be Tony’s own weirdly implied funeral rites: The sensation of imminent death “you probably don’t even hear it when it happens, right?” was now-famously discussed in an episode called “Soprano Home Movies.” This same episode was reportedly repeated, out of sequence, re-airing “you probably don’t even hear it when it happens, right?” the week before the finale. And the same exact scene “this same discussion of how death would be experienced “you probably don’t even hear it when it happens, right?” was also apparently excerpted in flashback in the second-to-last episode.

This is called hitting the audience in the face with a two-by-four, hoping they’ll notice. We have been instructed as to what to expect from first-person death, as clearly as any self-respecting dramatist would likely allow.

[Update: The song titles given close-ups on the jukebox also point directly to "Soprano Home Movies." And now I am informed that for the next episode, they're repeating "Soprano Home Movies," out of sequence, yet again. You are now being hit in the head with a truckload of lumber.]

Another strikingly obvious bit of information: shortly before his death, David Chase very briefly frames Tony in a shot that visually quotes the Last Supper (one-point perspective; special holy light from above (more obvious in the footage than the grab); a long horizontal base supporting triangular composition, human forms on both sides of the subject; etc.)

lastsupper.jpg

Hardly surprising that the entire family is wearing black at the end. [Additionally,] Tony’s shirt isn’t just black — it’s the exact same design he was wearing when he was shot the first time. This looks to be another reference back to “Members Only.”

The episode actually opens with a harbinger of Tony’s funeral, plain as day. Remember, David Chase personally directed for the first time since the series premiere. And David Chase’s very first shot in eight years is of Tony Soprano lying flat on his back, viewed from above, much as if we are looking down on him in his coffin.

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So give his article a read. You may be convinced.

More Richard Dawkins

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 27th, 2007
CBC News: Richard Dawkins Interview

A Good Sopranos-Related Laugh

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 25th, 2007

I laughed out loud when I saw this headline on the comedy website, The Onion:

James Gandolfini Shot by Closure-Seeking Fan

Who Knew Germany Was So Sensible?

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 25th, 2007

According to this story, Tom Cruise is being barred from filming within Germany’s borders.

Cruise, also one of the film’s producers, is a member of the Church of Scientology which the German government does not recognize as a church. Berlin says it masquerades as a religion to make money, a charge Scientology leaders reject.

The U.S. actor has been cast as Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg, leader of the unsuccessful attempt to assassinate the Nazi dictator in July 1944 with a bomb hidden in a briefcase.

Defense Ministry spokesman Harald Kammerbauer said the film makers “will not be allowed to film at German military sites if Count Stauffenberg is played by Tom Cruise, who has publicly professed to being a member of the Scientology cult.”

What’s the specific argument by Scientologists that their “religion” ISN’T merely a money-making venture? I’d like to hear it.

Let’s Go to the Rollercoasters!

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 23rd, 2007

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This website, http://www.rideaccidents.com, documents deaths and injuries in theme parks around the globe. It’s quite a sobering read, especially if you enjoy riding on rollycoasters. And who doesn’t enjoy that?

Dr. Evil Prairie Dog

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 21st, 2007

Sopranos Rub-out Theory Gains Credence

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 15th, 2007

According to this story, that theory I heard Monday morning about how the cut-to-black ending was actually Tony’s demise, is gaining some credibility. See, I know a good theory when I hear it.

While I’m still disappointed in the ending, I cannot change it so I’ll instead try to find ways to live with it. That includes mulling over theories that fit my interpretation of a suitable ending. That’s my process of coming to terms with the lackluster conclusion to an otherwise brilliant show. This may not be your process: fine. I’m not asking you to accept my process as your own.

If you think about it, this theory makes perfect sense. In our hearts, we all wanted something drastic to happen to Tony: death or incarceration (which Tony himself has acknowledged as the only two outcomes for a guy like him).

That final scene in the restaurant was designed specifically to keep us in “anticipation,” like the uncooperative ketchup bottle shaken by Tony’s lawyer at the Bing. When Meadow was parking her car, I was certain that something bad was going to happen. In fact, every frame in that scene had me on the edge of my seat. Given all the shady characters that had walked into the shop by the time Meadow comes in and Tony looks up, you’re ready to pop.

In the season 6B opener, Bobby comments to Tony about what it feels like to die. “At the end, you probably don’t hear anything, everything just goes black,” Bobby says while they sit fishing in a small boat on a lake.

Sorry, but that’s a big goddamned clue. I’m unsure how people who do not believe this theory can dismiss this clue. Regarding the cut-to-black ending and what it really means, David Chase has remarked “Anyone who wants to watch it, it’s all there.”

So if it was a whacking, why didn’t they show it? I guess it was an artistic choice. It wouldn’t have been mine and it probably wouldn’t have been yours. But whaddya gonna do?

Drop Your Bombs Between the What? **

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 13th, 2007

Minarets. ** the full line is a lyric from the song “Rock the Casbah” by The Clash.

How often does that word appear in a headline? I just had to point it out. I learned what a minaret is from high school social studies class. The guy who taught that class was the school’s varsity football coach (his name escapes me). I remember after our school won the “Erie Bell” from our rival school in ‘84 or ‘85, he showed a video of the game in class instead of following a lesson plan.

We skipped class that day.

Here’s a Good Commercial

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 9th, 2007

Swindle or Sincerity?

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 8th, 2007

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As the Sopranos comes to an end, there comes a wave of news articles like this one, featuring James Gandolfini reflecting on his experiences. To summarize the article, it basically says that Gandolfini is glad to be rid of Tony after 86 episodes and that the last couple seasons have been difficult because he’d stopped liking Tony a while ago. Or this one, featuring “Little” Steven Van Zandt, who portrays Silvio Dante, talking about how “controversial” the ending will be.

Such articles can be interpreted two ways.

A large portion of the speculation surrounding the Sopranos seems to involve the real conclusion to the story of the Sopranos being shown on the big screen rather than the small one. Never mind how cheated those same people would feel if that actually happened: can you imagine the final episode ending in a fucking cliffhanger? I can’t imagine it, myself, but then I have my limits.

Or maybe a spin-off series could be created, after all, why stop now when the Sopranos are as popular as ever and HBO would be left with no real successor. Big Love? Big snore. Deadwood, as great as it was, didn’t appeal to enough people. Rome was the only real successor to the Sopranos I could see but it was, apparently, too expensive to produce.

So the two ways the above articles can be interpreted are as follows:

1) The story should be taken at face value; it’s meant to drum up publicity. It’s really over. There will be no movie. There will be no spin-off. The whole thing will end in earnest (one way or another) with the 86th episode. In this camp, my tent can be found.

2) The story is smokescreen. They want to quell any possible rumor of a motion picture or new series so the surprise ending can be retained. What better way to do this than to put a story out there that features our biggest star poo-pooing the main character?

Part of me hopes for a surprise announcement of a spin-off series, but it would ultimately spoil the conclusion that a show like The Sopranos deserves, especially if it ended with a cliffhanger. So that’s why I think the cast & crew are all done and that we should all prepare to be shocked Sunday night when the end comes.

Sopranos Prediction

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 6th, 2007

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Predictions about what will happen on the Sopranos this Sunday night are a dime a dozen so let me go ahead and give you my own. Anyone that’s been paying close attention to the whole of Season 6 (the one that started with with Junior shooting Tony), they’ve been setting up a serious confrontation between Tony and Paulie. It’s pretty clear that Paulie is getting on Tony’s last nerve and now that they’ve gone to the mattresses, holed up in a house together, you can be sure it will come to a head. That’s my 100% guaranteed portion of the prediction.

The part I’m unsure of is whether 1) Paulie kills Tony, 2) Tony kills Paulie, or 3) neither. They probably took the safe route and went with 3) neither, however, what makes the most dramatic sense, given the arc of the characters, is that Paulie kills Tony. Here’s why.

  • Tony’s self-confidence is already shaken because he lost a fight to Bobby, due in part to his recovery process (which itself isn’t a big confidence booster).
  • We’ve seen Paulie work out with dumbells, so he’s in good shape.
  • Tony made a point to mention how tough he thought Paulie was. When they met with the latins to get all those drills, Paulie immediately jumped out of Tony’s Escalade ready for action, meanwhile, Tony was the one sitting there pleading for Paulie to stop.
  • What say you?

    Let’s Hear it For Them Rovers

    Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 6th, 2007

    Our robotic pals, Spirit and Opportunity, are on their 1217th and 1196th days (respectively) on Mars. This is remarkable considering everyone expected them to break down after 90 days of use. Granted, Spirit is damaged: it must move backwards because of a defective right-front wheel. But even this breakdown facilitated a big discovery, as the disabled wheel digs a mini-trench behind it (or in front of it, since it moves backwards).

    That was the case a few weeks ago as Spirit investigated a self-dug trench that exposed bright white soil. Utilizing a rover-toted spectrometer, scientists found that the uncovered material was 90 percent pure silica. “This is the kind of stuff that you need to have water to make that kind of concentration of silica,” said Steven Squyres, principal investigator for the NASA Mars Exploration Rover Project and astronomer at Cornell University in Ithaca, New York.

    What created that pure silica concentration has spurred thought about volcanic fumerals and hot springs on Mars, Squyres added. “Something very, very interesting happened here. And we discovered this after 1,200 days on the martian surface. It really makes me wonder what else is out there.”

    The full story can be read here.

    Opportunity, on the other hand, gets drunk every night and sleeps until noon.

    Cargo Cults

    Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 4th, 2007

    It’s likely not many people that come to the Mollify Cocktail Lounge will have heard of Cargo Cults…and more likely, will NEVER admit to not having heard of them. But anyway.

    I first heard about Cargo Cults last year when I was reading this story on Smithsonian.com. In a nutshell, Cargo Cults came from our efforts during World War II to establish bases in the Pacific theater for resupply & refueling. Natives on these islands mistook the American soldiers as spiritual beings and came to the goofy conclusion that cargo, which magically appeared from massive flying machines whenever the American soldiers’ supplies were low, came from God.

    Nearly 70 years later, there are natives on certain Pacific islands that still practice Cargo Cultism, complete with a strange ceremony that loosely resembles a U.S. Army assembly, undoubtedly observed by the tribal elders.

    My point in bringing this up now is this: why isn’t Cargo Cultism routinely referenced in arguements against the existence of God? If ignorance on the part of 20th century Pacific island natives (coupled with a spiritual thirst) can produce a belief system this out of whack, then why is it unthinkable that 2000+ years ago, there were similar circumstances?

    The answer: it isn’t.

    Top Bush Aide Comes to His Sens…Err…Resigns

    Posted by Christopher Van Epps on June 1st, 2007

    In this story, Dan Bartlett, who’d been with Jumpin George W. since 1993 when he was running for Governor of Texas, gives us the old “spend more time with my family” schtick as he submits his resignation to be effective in July.

    Way to go, Dan. I’ll be behind anyone in the Bush Administration who resigns before they have to.