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Archive for March, 2007

Bindi Irwin, the Retarded Croc Hunter

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on March 28th, 2007

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Steve Irwin’s 8-year-old child, Bindi, is special, and that’s why her Discovery Channel TV show is targeted for retarded kids who enjoy watching retarded animals.

“Hey Bindi, look at that big croc over there!  He’s chewing on his own tail!  Ha ha ha!”

“Crikey, Bindi.  That kangaroo is filling her pouch with her own feces.  Amazing!”

No, she’s not really retarded, despite what the picture looks like, but it’s good to know that those Aussies are just as shameless as we Yanks when it comes to exploitation.

Sixth Planet, Now With Six Sides

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on March 27th, 2007

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This is a picture of Saturn’s north pole, where a truly bizarre natural phenomenon can be found.  Saturn, it should be pointed out, is comprised of mostly gas, so it’s not like some alien race has one-upped us by constructing a 15,000-mile-wide military complex with six sides instead of five.

Monty Python/Star Trek Mashup

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on March 24th, 2007

This is really really funny if you’re familiar with the “Camelot” song from The Holy Grail.

And who isnt?

John Stewart Proves UN Ambassador Bolton Wrong

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on March 24th, 2007

This clip from The Daily Show illustrates what’s fundamentally wrong with the Bush Administration. The video speaks for itself, literally.

My Mother Punched Your Mother…

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on March 20th, 2007

…where?

Yikes

Would You Trust This Man to Teach You The Movie Business?

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on March 19th, 2007

Heir Direktor

In this story, Peter Bogdanovich, director of box office monsters The Last Picture Show and Paper Moon (snicker), is being sued for a bribery scam involving a man trying to get his son into the movie business. Bogdanovich and his business partner bilked this poor schlep out of $100,000 for the privilege of allowing his son to be an assistant to the director on Bogdanovich’s upcoming movie project.

Which movie project, you ask? No one’s really sure and I don’t know about you, but if I’m playing the role of protege, then I want a mentor that knows something about making movies. Not a guy who wears transition lenses and clearly wants the ascot to come back in style. I laugh whenever I see him on the Sopranos.

Ron Jeremy Planned 9/11?

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on March 15th, 2007

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Wow.  I had no idea an international porn star could be so prolific.

US Military Concerned With Morality

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on March 13th, 2007

In this story, General Peter Pace, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, proclaimed the homosexual act as immoral. Further, he refused to apologize for the remarks.

Excuse me, but aren’t you HIRED KILLERS? Since when is the US Military the arbiter of morality?

Parades in Latin America to Honor Bush

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on March 9th, 2007

TV Art Scam Bilked People Out of Millions

Posted by Christopher Van Epps on March 6th, 2007

…according to this story.

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You mean to tell me this isn’t a real “Tippy” hanging in my living room?  THOSE BASTARDS!