This story is going to be pretty big. James Cameron unearthed some artifacts he believes are the final resting places of Mary, Joseph, and their kid, Jesus. Aside from the fact that James Cameron is now the embodiment of Indiana Jones, this discovery is pretty amazing and will surely be seen as tantamount to heresy. I’m quite sure no matter how many DNA tests they run on these remains, the religious wackos will still believe that Jesus rose up to heaven upon his death and that Mary, despite having a baby, was a virgin.
Never mind that these artifacts were found. Forget for a moment they exist. Let’s go back to last week when all was well in the wonderful world of christianity. All the christians felt warm and fuzzy with their belief in the following:
- that an Invisible Man in the Sky somehow impregnated a woman on Earth and she gave birth to Jesus, the son of god;
- this woman had no other children with her legal husband Joseph;
- and oh, by the way, this woman was and always was a virgin;
- Jesus later resurrected Lazarus, a man who had been dead for days and had already begun to rot;
- Jesus was crucified by the jews and after he died, he came back 3 days later to say “what’s up” and he also appeared to various people in various places over the next forty days.
- Noah’s Ark. ‘Nuff said.
There’s a much longer list of ridiculous things christians believe, but for the sake of brevity (and because I have to shower and go to work soon) I’m going to cut it short.
My point here is that christians find the above bullet list (among hundreds of others) easier to believe than the far more logical scenario: that Jesus was a human man who just so happened to fill the spiritual need of a handful of people. These people started the rumor that he was the son of god. People are sheep (need I provide examples of this fact?) and they went right along with it.
I can almost understand how this happened. After all, it’s more fun to believe something outrageous, isn’t it? I’ll admit it. It’s fun! If we were around back then, scratching around for jobs, food, homes, etc. and someone said they were going to listen to the son of god speak later today, who wouldn’t want to hear that? Shit, I got nothing better to do today! I got no job, no food…fuck it! I’ll listen to him, why not?
Well done, christians. Way to employ that critical thinking! Gold star!









