Head over to Jack Ruby’s Alibi to take a listen to our new song, Hovercraft.
Head over to Jack Ruby’s Alibi to take a listen to our new song, Hovercraft.

You may be asking, what the hell happened to Jake, the dog belonging to the late Billy Deck and now owned by my brother Steven? Well, it seems Jake broke his leg during a squirrel-chasing episode. While taking tests, the vets discovered terminal bone cancer in that particular leg, which is why it broke so easily. Steven considered putting him down briefly but he couldn’t do it, which is completely understandable. So now, the Pooch de la Nooch must hop around on three legs but knowing Jake the way I do, I’m certain he doesn’t notice the difference.
I’m sure it’s only temporary but Mike and I have run into some trouble after recording the vocals for Hovercraft. We were under the delusion that the vox were really good ONE evening, only to discover the same recording was stinking up the place the following (more sober) evening. I don’t want to blame intoxicants altogether but judgement certainly has a way of vacationing when imbibing alcohol.
Triangle-area singer Sue Bradford forwarded this notice to me…
With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry LaPrise, the man who wrote “The Hokey Pokey”, died peacefully at age 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin.
They put his left leg in. And then the trouble started.
Just a quick update. It was amazingly easy to set up the new Jack Ruby’s Alibi site.
Wow, web hosting has really come a long, long way from the old days. And who’d have thought “the old days” would ever refer to only ten years ago?
Welcome fellow Edsonians. Yes, it’s been a year shy of twenty since we graduated, but to me, it seems like only nineteen. This blog is really my only form of communication with the outside world and it fits my personality well: it’s been said that I’m much better in print than in person. I don’t disagree.
I live in a ramshackle town called Apex, North Carolina. “the peak of good living” is the town’s motto…I kid you not. I’ve discovered a similarity between the “feel” of this area and the “feel” of Elmira, NY. Despite this feeling, I’ve stayed here for 10 years.
What am I up to? Working as a Technical Writer for a benefits outsourcing firm. We have the dubious distinction of having been bought & sold five times over. First, we were Kwasha Lipton, creators of the Cash Balance Pension Plan, the one that received all that bad press a few years back. Then, Cooper & Lybrand bought us. Then Pricewaterhouse which soon became PricewaterhouseCoopers. Then a few of us struck out on our own as Unifi Network, which lasted about 7 months. We were picked up by Mellon (the one based in Pittsburgh, PA) and as of May of 2005, we were bought by Affiliated Computer Services, Inc. (ACS) based in Austin, TX.
A few words about this website. It’s way more than I need technology-wise, bandwidth-wise, and content-wise. It’s primarily a vehicle to store and showcase my music downloads. A few words about that…I harbor no illusions about my musician status. I’m an amateur-musician/hobbyist. I enjoy expressing myself musically and I like the process of making songs: the lyrics, the melody, the chords. Like any hobby one might engage in, I strive to improve. No, I don’t have the strongest singing voice, but that’s never stopped anyone else. Have you heard Johnny Rotten actually try to hit notes? Yikes!
“The Triangle Area” of North Carolina, as they call it, has experienced a large amount of growth in the past ten years, so businesses tend to want to set up shop here. It’s like the growth of Horseheads, NY, only Raleigh-Durham has a much less-silly sounding name. This is where Michael Sweeney comes into the picture. A big part of Mike’s job is travel. I don’t envy him since I really hate to travel. The company Mike works for happens to have a small satellite office in the town next to mine. So when Mr. Sweeney has to conduct business in this area, he stops by to shoot the shit and drink beer.
During a particular Sweeney-visit, I had a few of my guitars propped up on their stands in the living room. The sight of them seemed to awaken something inside young Michael, a burning sensation the likes of which he’d never felt (I should point out that months later, Mike was treated for ulcers, but that doesn’t really help the drama of the story, so please forget you read this parenthetical). Before you can say “impulse shopping,” Mike rushed out and purchased no fewer than 5 guitars. I asked him, “So what can you play?” “Play?” he queried. “What do you mean?” So I took it upon myself to tutor young Michael in the ways of the guitar. I soon discovered that he has a fairly natural guitar-playing ability.
Three years and several dozen visits later, Mike and I have started a band called Jack Ruby’s Alibi. Our first song appears on a Replacements tribute compilation; Here Comes a Regular. Yes, that’s Mike Sweeney singing and playing electric guitar. Our first original tune, Hovercraft, is being wrapped up in the next couple weeks, if not sooner. Hovercraft was written almost entirely by Mr. Sweeney. His transformation from music noob to music man has been remarkable, to say the least.

Were it not for Mike’s involvement, I’d have given this expensive hobby up a long time ago. I’d been writing songs here and there, with no real plan on producing them. But the charge I’ve gotten from our collaboration has prompted me to begin production in earnest. Twenty-seven songs, a few of which have been co-authored by Mike, are in the pipeline.

Seems that Christopher Walken for President site was phony. That’s typical: finally a politician comes along who has the balls to take a firm stand to the far left and what happens? It turns out to be a joke. Too bad, I liked his platform.
Hillary Clinton, knowing what sitting to the far left would mean to her presidential chances, is playing it very smart by hooking her wagon to a real conservative issue: violence in videogames. Of course, it’s really not much of an issue and she’s aware of this fact. But getting behind this non-issue establishes Clinton as a credible candidate to the red states and their narrow view of the world. Meanwhile, us blue-state types understand what her real agenda is. In short, she’s a real politician.
But I still would have voted for Christopher Walken.
Criggy-Bo-Biggie sent me an early-morning e-mail to tell me that cvanepps.com had been hacked. Congrats, fellas. You’ve hacked a site that no one visits. I guess the big sites have already been hacked hundreds of times over, so it’s not fun anymore.
I thought it was a joke when I first saw it but it seems Christopher Walken has decided to run for president in 2008.
If it’s not a joke, I think I might like to vote for him. I like what he’s had to say so far.
But, man oh man, I can hear the punchlines and see the film clip montages already!
This story won’t be a working link much longer so I’ll summarize it here.
Cindy Sheehan, mother of an Army specialist killed in April 2004, has set up a protest vigil five miles away from Bush’s ranch in Texas. Bush says he respectfully disagrees with Cindy Sheehan about pulling troops out of Iraq, saying such an act would send the wrong signal to it’s enemies, and that in addition to thinking “long and hard” about the situation, he grieves for “every death.”
You know, I don’t doubt that Bush grieves. I really don’t. I’m certain he feels badly about having been the cause of hundreds of thousands of deaths, a mere 1,800 of which were Americans. I’m not being facetious. I really believe he feels badly.
But he feels bad for the absolute wrong reason. Bush has started this war with two agendas: 1) revenge for Hussein attempting to assassinate his father and 2) oil/money. That whole shit about weapons of mass destruction and ties with Al Qaeda were just window-dressing for getting public support. The fact that Bush’s sense of vengeance and an increase to the Bush family fortune were paid for with blood are the things he should be grief-stricken about.
The truth is what those mothers deserve to hear, especially if they voted for Bush. Sorry, but that’s how I feel.
It seems many of the ex-jurors in the Michael Jackson case have succumbed to their need for attention and publicly said they were bullied into an acquittal by the other jurors, despite their strong feelings that Jackson was probably guilty.
I really hate these people. I fail to understand the need for these folks to voice their opinion N O W !
It only serves to make them look completely ridiculous. Even if they did strongly feel that Jackson was guilty, the time to step up was in the jury room, not one month after the verdict was read. I can empathize feeling apathetic as a juror (the key word there being empathize) but I cannot understand voting against your feelings. And every stupid story I’ve seen on this features Jackson’s morally-bankrupt lawyer complaining about this or that. Never mind the defense…can you imagine how the prosecution feels?
HBO has said that the drama series will have an additional eight episodes on top of the existing twelve for season six, causing them to go out in much the same fashion as Sex and the City did.
I knew that situation sounded a little weird; that another season could be added without affecting season six. Let’s hope these additional episodes will close the curtain in a way befitting of the spirit of the show. Tony’s got two paths: 1) prison or 2) death. If that eighth bonus episode doesn’t feature Tony being measured for either an orange jumpsuit or a coffin, then I’ll know there’s a seventh season coming.
At least, there better be.
This story is big big news. I’ve pasted the whole thing, from beernews.com.
The North Carolina Senate paved the way for the sale of stronger beers within the state, giving final approval to a bill that raises the alcohol limit of malt beverages from 6 to 15%. The measure appeared to be on a fast track a little more than a month ago, but got hung up in committee and looked as if it might get squashed. The final vote was 27-21 in favor of raising beer strength. “We did it!” said Julie Bradford, of the nonprofit group Pop the Cap, which had worked for more than two years to change the law. Asheville’s Highland Brewing Company has already brewed a batch of 8% Scottish-style ale, for which it will now seek permits to sell in North Carolina, said brewery founder Oscar Wong. Under the current law, which dated to the repeal of Prohibition, beers in North Carolina are limited to 6% alcohol by volume, although much stronger wines and potent liquors were permitted. Only six states still held beer to 6% alcohol.
Good news about that Russian minisub. It was rescued today when a British remote-controlled mini-minisub cut the cable that the Russian sub was tangled in. That must’ve been a pretty joyous ascent. Vodka for everyone!
OK, so what’s with the Russians’ submarine program? This is the second big submarine tragedy in five years for them. What’s going on out there? Did they lose the “secret of fire” or what? Drinking too much vodka, perhaps? Still not sure how to make the democracy thing work, maybe? Don’t feel bad. We drink a lot of vodka too and we also have not figured out how to make democracy work. You’re in good company, Russia! Nostrovia!
I was fiddling with a possible redesign of the site, adding less-somber colors as a main focus, but I quickly realized that I can’t easily do that because of the Flash animations I’ve got all over this stupid thing. I’d have to redo all the hover button jpgs, the entire music menu, the “other stuff” left-side animation…it’s a real job. So the light-grey-on-navy will have to do for a while longer.
But I’d really like to change it one day. Perhaps I’ll get those lazy Norwegians on the job!
This story talks about how the moronic get duped by the unscrupulous by giving them their ATM pin numbers. Obviously, this sort of thing wouldn’t happen if the moronic knew a thing or two about human nature. Is it so hard for the morons to be untrusting?
Is it so wonderful a feeling to wake up and think, “Golly, I sure am stupid. Think I’ll head out to the gun store today and stock up on buckshot but not before I reply to this here e-mail from my bank, asking for my account number and PIN number. I understand, heck, I lose stuff all the time!”
I can’t imagine that in 2005, people still fall for the “e-mail from the bank” thing. We even get those e-mails at work, occasionally. Sure, I throw them away but I always fuck with them first: sometimes I reply with fake numbers. Sometimes, I’ll reply with a paragraph from a Raymond Carver short story. Sometimes, I’ll reply with a recipe for Shepherd’s Pie.
The next time you get one, reply with this little poem.
There once was an idiot with a bank account
and a scumbag to which nothing he’d amount,
the scumbag would phish
and the idiot would wish
But I’m neither, so go fuck yourself.
Peter Krause, reluctant owner of Fisher & Diaz Funeral Home on HBO’s Six Feet Under has been killed off by series writers. I thought it was a good choice. They’ve only got three episodes left and I feel he’s been through enough; let the poor guy rest already. Not for nothing but it may be the only effective method of getting away from his bird-faced spouse, Brenda, played by aussie Rachel Griffiths. I think the show’s quality has suffered a bit. I can see the reasons for taking the turns they took, but it just didn’t seem as much fun to watch characters get their comeuppance. For instance, Ruth’s penchant for taking care of others needed to be tested, so they threw George Sibley at her. David and Keith seemed to want kids so damn bad, so they gave them Fire and Brimstone; the Hell twins. I never bought into Claire and Billy being together, so that was just a wrong turn. But the storyline featuring her in an office setting was inspired. “Yeah, Baby.” But they ruined it by pairing her up with dog-faced lawyer, Ted.
Entourage – This show continues to be entertaining. I like the way they continue to dangle trouble in front of young Vincent Chase; that life’s not all roses & treacle. Keep it going, I say.
The Comeback – Conversely, it takes a real effort to watch this show without me switching the channel. I do not like Lisa Kudrow’s constant camera mugs nor do I think the show is very interesting or well-written at all. I realize that I may not be the right audience for this show. Even if I was, the writers may be writing Valerie Cherish in a purposefully-annoying way; like I’m not supposed to like her. If that’s the case: mission accomplished! I don’t find her trials & tribulations cute or funny. She finally did ONE THING to make me like her but it was at the very end of this last episode; the one with the Lincoln Navigator, which is what…the seventh episode? No wonder this is on HBO, if a character like her were to lead a network sitcom but she didn’t do anything to make the audience like her until episode seven, it would be totally cancelled by episode six…at the latest.
I just checked. That Lincoln Navigator episode is number eight. Well done, guys. Please go the way of Carnivà le and never return.